24 Comments
May 20, 2022Liked by Arielle Friedman

"6. Severe violence is a worse form of abuse than minor violence or psychological abuse."

disagree--this is like saying "Large odd numbers are bigger than small odd numbers or even numbers"

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Do you view physical violence and psychological abuse as being totally distinct?

In my view they're absolutely on a spectrum. That's why post-separation violence is so common: the breakup is often when psychological stops working, and so the only remaining option for abusers is violence.

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No I mean I would adopt a legal standard of what is physical violence--I am unaware if the law admits of edge cases here--that something meets the legal standard of physical violence has a psychological reality esp. considering how someone's technical ability to charge someone may in some cases give real leverage in the game theory.

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Are you arguing the law should make psychological abuse a crime? When it comes to physical abuse, the law does distinguish between different types of violence, but I could see an argument that that should be more fine-grained.

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No I'm saying whatever the contingent legal reality is necessarily a psychological reality when the punishments are meaningful -- the law's structure induces a sharp boundary whether you believe in it at a lower metaphysical level or not.

But since you ask, coercive control should be illegal:

https://www.facebook.com/search/top?q=%22coercive%20control%22%20%22adam%20golding%22

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL_-Kd_WSmEAHZB-jaxNCsSAscbqrUJNZC

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The series Bad Vegan and The Puppetmaster (not to mention all the cult stuff that is coming out right now) definitely tend towards it being a good idea to make coercive control illegal. 'Consent' is such a problematic concept - in both those cases the victim is 'consenting' to the abuse because they are so coercively controlled that they have apparently lost their own will.

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It's a difficult question. Threats and intimidation should probably be illegal but I'm not convinced manipulation/pressure should be (when it involves adults, anyway). I tend to think people grow by learning to navigate people who act like that - I know I've learned a lot from the manipulative people I've known as an adult, and it's made me a stronger person with better boundaries.

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I agree that laws create and assert a psychological reality, but I don't believe that's the only psychological reality. Subtle social effects also guide/shape psychology.

Agreed about coercion.

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May 20, 2022Liked by Arielle Friedman

Being the only reality is not relevant -- it's just a big enough difference that you will need to make at least the legal distinction for most purposes.

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